My December Whole30

Just got back from a 2-week trip to visit family in Tennessee, North Carolina, and South Carolina.  I was doing well with Paleo eating (not Whole30, but Paleo) up until the trip, and was holding steady in my weight.  Now only 2 short weeks of NOT clean eating later I have gained 8 lbs and have terrible sugar cravings.  So, back on Whole30 I go.  My sis-in-law is joining me this time...always nice to have a partner in crime.

I'm trying to take pics of what I eat this time around, just for kicks.

So on my first day, I do not feel exceptionally hungry, but am jittery and shaky and full of sugar cravings.  I have never had a first day feel this bad.  Whew!  And I've already overdone it a little in the fruit department today (even though I've mixed them with proteins/meals rather than eating them straight up, I've had a banana and an apple today plus a bite of a dried fig roll).  No more fruit today, and no more than one piece and a little dried fruit max from now on.

That's it for now.  I haven't posted for a loooong time because life has been so busy.  Getting near the end of midwifery school, contemplating my future, possibly moving, etc.  It's a lot to think about.

Sequoia - July 2012

Our friend from back in Florida flew over to see us for a week or so.  While he was here, he wanted to see the giant redwoods...so we were Sequoia-bound!

Josh and Trav in front of the General Grant tree, the 5th biggest tree in the world!

My fearless rock-climbers and hikers!

Dad and boys in front of the General Sherman tree, the biggest tree by volume in the world!

Deklan on the fallen largest branch of the General Sherman...this branch was as big as a large tree!

See Trav beside the branch?  It was taller than HE was, for some perspective on the size of this "branch"...

My all-time favorite pic of the day

We had a great time enjoying the cool forest air, a nice departure from the intensely dry heat of the valley floor.  We hiked all around the General Sherman tree and General Grant tree, and everyone was in awe of the size of these ancient trees!  There was a fallen tree that was sawed for a cross-section and was found to be 2,210 years old by ring-counting!!  This tree was smaller than the Sherman, believe it or not.  That tree was alive before the birth of Christ!  Such a crazy thought...

Only half-way

This post is really about two things.  The first is my half-way point in weight loss.  I've been hovering there for the last long while, which I'm sure is why I feel like I'm ONLY half-way there.  Don't get me wrong, I know this is a huge accomplishment, but I just feel stuck.  It is nice to have people compliment your pics, though...like this one that I posted on Facebook from our trip to the Sequoia National Park this weekend:

Great family pic, no?  It makes me smile, looking at our little family.  It also makes me smile that I wasn't huffing and puffing up and down the trails, even with 25+ lb baby on my back (much love to my Babyhawk) because even with him tied onto me I still weighed less and had more endurance than when I started this fitness journey.

This brings me to part two, the long and yucky part, of this post.  I've been doing this half-way for about 2 months now.  I've been maintaining my weight, even lost a stray pound here and there and am definitely toning up, but I'm just not trying 100%.  I've been doing CrossFit 3 days per week (not this last week though, since we have a friend in town) and was actually running 2 days per week as well, until I got tired (after a couple of weeks) and started having a shin splint flare up again.  Now my shins are better but I haven't run.  I eat Whole30 all day until night comes, then snack on crackers and peanut butter.

So now that I'm thoroughly discouraged by my half-way behavior and the results of it, now that I'm owning this flaw, I'm prepared to move forward.  No more half-way.  I'm running again starting tomorrow, CrossFit 3 days per week again starting Wednesday.  Whole30 again starting today (hello, Day 1!).  Additionally, I've felt for a while that I've probably been overdoing it in the fats department, even though they're healthy fats.  So I'm going to use my SparkPeople account (which I haven't opened for months) for tracking for a week or two until I get my proportions straight again.  I just think it'll be helpful for me to see what I'm consuming throughout the day.

I started this in September of last year, in earnest.  My 30th birthday was a huge reality check for me, and was just the thing to kick me in the butt and get me moving.  But I'm creeping up on my 31st birthday now and I'm only at the half-way point when I should really be close to my goal.  I have to start training religiously for the half-marathon in November or I'm not going to be able to finish it.  I need to keep up with CrossFit because it makes me incredibly happy and tired and I like seeing my arms lose the jigglies and gain some definition.

I'm making a determination RIGHT NOW.  I will be at my goal weight before my 32nd birthday.  If it took me a year to get half-way there, surely I can finish the other half in another 14 months.  I desperately want it to be much before my birthday, but one thing is for certain:  I will not have another birthday pass with me being unhappy with my state of fitness.

Back on track

Well, I've been off the beaten path for the last couple of weeks.  I went off for our anniversary and have made a couple of half-hearted attempts to get back on, but have really just been slacking.  I haven't weighed myself or anything and I've continued to exercise, but I don't feel great...I feel bloated and sluggish, so it's time to get back on track.

In order to inspire myself, I put together a little list (on painting paper, with crayon...gotta work with what you've got!) and posted it at my desk in my room.  This is what it says (color and all):

June 18th - Monday
* Back on Whole30 (meets GAPS) (back to back till 31st birthday)
* Stay on!  Print cheat sheets, etc.
* Run 2-3 days per week, CrossFit 2-3 days per week
* Wake up early to exercise if that's what it takes
* No weighing till end of Whole30
* Ship out clothes to Lolo (NO GOING BACK!)
* Be strict - easy on the kombucha, easy on nuts/dried cranberries

Soft Goals
* Be at 2nd goal (no longer overweight, 145 lbs) by my birthday
* Be at goal by November trip (for looks, pics, and weight during events reasons)

Events
* Finish B210K by end of July
* Start 13.1 training beginning of August
* Heart Walk/Run Sept. 22
* Color Me Rad Sept. 29
* Warrior Dash Oct. 27
* 2 Cities Half Marathon Nov. 4

I say "Whole30 meets GAPS" because I'm adding supplements from GAPS and doing more traditional/fermented foods like GAPS, but not actually doing GAPS.  Weighing during my Whole30 is something I have to make a conscious effort not to do...I actually have Travis hide the scale.  I set soft goals in addition to the events because I have some milestone types of things coming up and (yes, this is pure vanity) I would like to look good!  We'll be doing a ton of family pictures, etc.  Not only that, but I have a LOT of events starting the end of September, right around my birthday.  The less excess weight I'm carrying around, the better!  I'm planning on doing the Heart Run for time, to actually try to come in at a certain pace.  On the other hand, I'm trying to recruit some people from work to do this as their first 5k, in which case I would pace with them to keep together as a group.  We'll see how many people join up.

I listed the events because I want to keep them as a focus.  It's been so blasted hot that I've been doing CrossFit but not running for about a month now, which is purely unacceptable if I have a half-marathon in November!  So this next paycheck will buy me a used treadmill so I can run at home/at night/with a fan blowing on me...whatever works.  Meanwhile I'm going to attempt to switch my workout routine to the morning.  That will not come easy for me, as I am not a morning person by any stretch.  But I have to do what I have to do!  I need to register for these events so that I get that swift kick in the pants that comes along with putting money down on something. 

In all honesty, I've gotten complacent and I'm scared to death about gaining a bunch of weight, and I feel cruddy.  It's time.  Back on the wagon.

I have one more week in this term.  Let the cramming begin.

I got promoted to manager at work.  It's been a pleasure to work with the people I used to work with, even though several have moved on to other areas or hospitals.  But a core remains, and I'm looking forward to working more with them and getting to know the new crew.

Time flies...

I can hardly believe how time seems to be flying these days.  I've had a few milestone things happen in the last month.

Firstly, it seems that this term is really flying!  There are only a couple of weeks left.  Next term is ALL midwifery courses, as opposed to this term (Primary Care and Pharmacology).  It'll be nice to kiss this term goodbye and get into the nitty gritty, although I do realize that courses get more intense as you move through.

Second, Travis and I celebrated our 10th wedding anniversary this month.  Wow.  Ten years...a decade.  We've moved 8 times in 3 different states, had three kids (and one miscarriage), worked many different jobs, and been through SO much change.  I think about the vows we made..."to have and to hold for better or for worse, for richer or for poorer, in sickness and in health, for as long as we both shall live"...I've learned the importance and the depth of these vows.  The last 10 years have been awesome.  Not always easy or happy or the way we planned, but they've been awesome because we've been through everything together and supported each other every step of the way.  I'm looking forward to more decades to come!

Third, my biggest baby finished another year of school.  I'm so proud of him!  He made "A" Honor Roll and also got awards for most work completed, scripture memory, and art.  He'll be going into his 3rd grade year in the fall.  My middle man will start kindergarten.  It hardly seems possible.

I'm running a 10k on Father's Day.  I'm scared because I don't feel ready for it.  I felt ready for the 5k, and had run the whole 5k before the day of the race so I knew I could do it.  I've gotten up to 4 miles, but that's still a far cry from the 6 miles of a 10k.  Susan signed me up, though, so I have to suck it up and do it, even if I have to walk part of the way.  Guess I need to start eating right again too so I'll lose more weight and recover better.  I've been off Whole30 for a few days for my anniversary, but I'm feeling it now in my workouts and really need to jump back on it.

CrossFit kicks my butt, but it's addictive.  How can this be?  I'm almost always the last to finish, and I have to do some modifications, but I'm getting muscles and it's awesome!  I look at the athletes around me and am in awe.  They inspire me, and I feel so comfortable there.  I don't feel like everyone is watching me...heck, we're all working too hard!  But at the same time they all cheer me on.  When they see that I'm dragging they cheer me on.  When I finish they congratulate me.  There's a camaraderie there that's just so cool, and the feel is so much different from a "Globo-Gym" type of set-up.  I'm hooked.

One of my friends asked that I be with her for her recent home birth.  I was honored and thrilled to be there, and even happier that the little man waited for a 3-day weekend to arrive!  We had a great time, chatting in early labor, putzing around...I helped with the kids (6 kids, 7 when I left!) and made dinner, cleaned, did some laundry, and tried to support her the best I knew how.  She and her husband know that I'm a birth junky and were so gracious letting me into their sacred birthing space.  It was her 7th home birth but her first water birth.  She loved it!  The birth went so smoothly (after a LONG prodromal labor) and I was just elated to have been a part of it!  I can't WAIT till I'm a midwife and get to be "with woman" all of the time!

Altogether new...

Well, this week is a week of new beginnings.

First category: fitness.
I started my 10K training program this week using the Bridge to 10K (B210K) app.  I had a near-death experience running in 94 degree heat in the sunshine (duh...) and resolved to haul my lazy bones out of bed in the morning and run before it gets hot.  I will attempt this tomorrow morning.  My running buddy has be roped in to a 10K on Father's Day, so I need to get crackalackin' to be ready in time.

Finally, I started CrossFit.  The folks over at CrossFit Fresno got me off to a great start and were very encouraging.  The workout of the day (WOD) kicked my butt.  They showed me some basics and helped me correct my form, then gave me my very first "Foundations" WOD.  It was rowing 500 meters, then sets of air squats and pushups, followed by another 500m row.  There were 10 sets of each exercise, decreasing the reps each set...so I did 10 squats/10 pushups, 9 squats/9 pushups, and so on.  My arms and legs are noodles.  Soggy, wet, overcooked, wobbly noodles.  In addition to my sports bra I wear a compression tank to hold the goodies in place, and I couldn't even get it off to shower when I got home because my arms were so noodly.  Holy moly.  I go back Monday.  I'm hooked.  And I won't look like an idiot when I do Warrior Dash.

Second category: nutrition.
I started another round of Whole30 on Monday.  I had a weekend of chocolate cake-eating and highly regretted it.  It took until just yesterday to get my guts straightened out again.

Third category:  work.  
I'm taking an interim position as manager of the floor that I used to work on.  This is inspiring and scary and nerve-wracking and awesome all wrapped up in one ball of insanity.  I've been on orientation with the current manager this whole week (tomorrow is her last day), and I *think* I'm ready.  I just want to do right by the floor, the staff, the patients.

All of the above makes me so tired...must sleep...pillow is calling.

5K race? Check!

Well, I get to check something off of my New Year's Resolution list today...I ran my first 5K!  And afterward I felt great and still had energy.  As Susan, my quasi-coach, coworker, and friend says..."We finished in the upright position, without vomiting, and wanting to do it again!"  I was nervous about finishing without taking a walk break, I'll admit it.  But I did it!  I'll tell you what, having cheerleaders every mile was nice, and coming down the final leg to the finish line with people cheering for you and clapping is an awesome feeling!  

Before the race...

 After the race!  A little more red in the face, but otherwise no worse for the wear!

It was also a pleasure to have been able to do some fundraising for such a wonderful group.  It was a solemn thought...after the race and festivities they released balloons with messages attached to the little ones that we've lost.  There were a lot of balloons.  To think that every person there had been touched by the loss of a baby...solemn indeed.

The boys did great in their races, too!  They got little medals and I'm hanging their bibs on the wall in their room.  As for mine...it's on my Board of Inspiration on the wall beside my desk.  :)  Oh, and I'm off Whole30 for the weekend, starting back on Monday.

Rolling (and running and studying) merrily along...

Warm weather has returned to the Valley!  I'm not especially happy about this as I'm a definite cold-weather gal and I detest the insane power bills that are sometimes unavoidable in the summer in an area where triple digits are the norm.  But warm weather brings pool fun and summer vacation for the boys, so I'm happy about that.  As things heat up I'm going to have to either get used to running in the heat, buy a treadmill, or join a gym.  

Speaking of training, not only is my first 5k only TWO WEEKS from now (squee!), but Trav and I are going to sign up for the Warrior Dash in Hollister happening this October.  I'm really excited about this as it gives me a goal toward which to train.  I've learned that that is THE key to sticking with working out...I need a goal.  Not just a weight loss goal, but a point on a timeline at which I MUST be finished with something that requires training.  Registering for the Angel Babies 5k has really helped me break through my running barriers and keep going.  Oh, and if you'd like to donate to support this wonderful group and us as we run, please click here.  I'm only 2 weeks from the run and only at 10% of my fundraising goal...yikes! Anyhoo, there is a group from the Neuroscience unit who is signing up for Warrior Dash (along with their spouses and even grown children), and we're going to run it together.  It is a 5k obstacle course (think Tough Mudder but only half of it), and I'm going to really have to work on my upper body and core strength in order to complete it.  Oh, and we'll get a fuzzy Viking helmet and a metal when we finish...how stinkin' cool is that?

This is not us...just so ya know...

I'm two weeks in to this Whole30, feeling great and going strong.  True to my usual stick-with-it routine, I weighed myself this morning (yeah, I know, I know...not supposed to weigh for 30 days...but it helps me stay encouraged!!).  I started this Whole30 at 186 lbs (yup, put a few pounds back on during my week off last time), and I am now 178!  I have broken the 180's plane!  Woohoo!  Not only that, but this number puts me only 4 pounds away from my first weight loss goal of 174 lbs.  The link is to my blog post explaining my goals and why I set them.  So, 36 lbs down, 4 more to go till 40 lbs/BMI category of "overweight" instead of "obese"/first goal!  My first goal also puts me just short of the halfway point in my weight loss journey.  NOW, I know that the point of Whole30 isn't weight loss...weight loss follows if you're eating healthier and have excess weight, naturally.  So I have to put in a plug for the health effects of eating clean.  We got a bug.  Typical cold/upper respiratory crap.  And it has been so mild for me that I've wondered several times if it wasn't just allergies.  I've been drinking Kombucha every day and eating well and drinking plenty of water...and it just seems like I'm kicking this bug better.  Nice.  Oh, and I'm not bloated and icky-feeling.  Nice, too.

My scars from my accident have proven to be a pain in the butt...or ankle/shin to be exact.  The area where the boat prop severed three tendons in my ankle has become filled with scar tissue, and the posterior shin splints that I was getting were improving but still present.  Certain movements were causing my ankle to literally lock up and I'd be hobbling around like I had injured myself.  So I went to Ruste, my trusted, wonderful, best-ever-in-the-world chiropractor.  She does crazy myofacial release and I was hoping that she could work wonders on the scar tissue in my ankle.  And work wonders she did!!  It nearly made me cry, and I broke out in a cold sweat from the pain, but I have NONE of the problems that I had before!  Love that lady!

Long-winded post, I know.  But I have one more thing to add.  I joined the birthy group in the area, the Childbirth Resource Network.  This is something that I've been wanting to do for a long time, but I always felt that I wouldn't really be settling here, so why bother?  Well, we've been here for 4 years, so I figured it was time to stop procrastinating.  I want to be involved.  I want to be a part of the change.  I want to help.  I'm excited.

Was it really worth it?

Creme brulee at Fleming's?  Bread?  Cheese?  Holy moly, I have felt like crud for the last 24 hours.  But it was sure fun while I was partaking!  I woke up congested and feeling generally bad, didn't drink hardly any water today, didn't eat really great today either (as in an egg and sausage for breakfast with no veggies, two hard boiled eggs and cantaloupe for lunch), then went running when I got home from work.  I increased again, running in 9-minute increments.  I really feel like I'm getting past some invisible duration hump!  However, around 2.5 miles in my inner calves along my shins started cramping up.  I sat down for a minute and massaged out the muscles.  I attribute this to eating poorly for the last day and drinking next to no water...I think my muscles just didn't have the fuel to make it through!  I did, however, finish my run and didn't bail out in my increase.  Woohoo!  Go me!  Oh, and Whole30 starts again tomorrow.  Booyah.

So, my buddy-ol-pal has entered the blogosphere!  Please go show The Clucky Housewife some love!  She's a real hoot, a fabulous woman, and a wonderful momma to her chicks.  And she has an amazing VBA2C story that will bring tears to your eyes!  I've been friends with her since she was pregnant with her first baby (and me with my second), so I've gotten the privilege of seeing her make the journey that she has made to being an informed, strong, knowledgeable mother.  Go watch her stories/montages about her c-sections, her plan to homebirth, then the subsequent birth of their third.  It's worth your time.   

Another term bites the dust!

That's right!  Another term down!  I got As in all three classes, and I'm totally stoked that I have only 2 classes this coming term.  This last one was not easy...Research wasn't nearly as much fun as I thought it would be.

Well, I'm wrapping up the first of my two back-to-back Whole30s.  It ends Tuesday officially.  Although it wasn't quite over, I weighed myself this morning for the first time in nearly a month and found that I am down about 12 lbs this round, making for a total of 30 lbs lost since I started this journey.  Yup, I weighed somewhere between 183 and 184 this morning, and I started at 214!  That's really a lot of weight.  Pick up a 30 lb bag of dog food and carry it around with you for a little while.  That's how much extra weight I was carrying around EVERY SINGLE MOMENT of my life.  It hardly seems possible.  You know what also hardly seems possible?  I fit into a size 14 now!  I started at a 20, could squeeze into an 18 but it was tight.  Now I fit comfortably into a 14.  I can't even recall the last time I wore a 14.  I'm pretty sure it was before I started having babies!  :)  I'm trying to get a couple of friends on board for my next round of Whole30 starting April 4th.  That way we can support each other.

My weight loss so far...

I'm on Week 5, Day 2 of C25K.  I've gone from running in 30-45 second intervals to 4-5 minute intervals.  Next run will be my first 6 minute interval.  I slacked off for a little more than a month due to sickness (pertussis then norovirus...it was a rough month or so) and traveling out of state.  But then I registered for my first race, the 8th annual Angel Babies 5k run to benefit Hind's Hospice's Angel Babies program.  I thought that would be good, and significant for me having an angel baby of my own.  It happens May 5th, and if I stay on task with C25K I will be finished with the program a week before the race.  So when I really don't feel like running, I do it anyway because I HAVE to in order to be ready for my first race.  I also signed the boys up for the kid's fun runs...they get their own t-shirt and bib and everything.  They are so excited!

After I finish that, it's on to Bridge to 10K (B210K), then the half-marathon.  I hung a list of my New Year's resolutions in my office and at my desk at home to remind me.  I really need to stay on it in order to be ready in November.

My new niece, Emma!

So I went back home in February for the birth of my niece.  Little Emma was born while I was there...the day before I left, actually.  My baby sister is a mommy!  She pushed that 8 lb, 3 oz baby out of her tiny little body and I am so proud of her!  It was an action-packed trip that will require a post of its own.  Lots of family stuff.  But one family-unrelated thing happened that was SO awesome.  I went by Rosemary in hopes of recharging my emotional batteries and seeing Harmony for the first time in about 4 years.  She was there and it was so good to see her again!  She showed me the things that had changed and gave me the encouragement and wisdom that had come seeking.  Then the unspeakable happened...she offered me an apprenticeship!  This is something I have been thinking, dreaming, and praying about ever since I started midwifery school, but I didn't know how to ask or if it would even be possible.  It will not count toward my clinicals, but it will be a balancing experience that I NEED.  She offered for me to come down for a month or so during their busiest time to offer another set of hands and to get some practical homebirth, LM-guided midwifery practice.  I tell you, I was walking on air.